The control "in the name of love" is not love at all.
the hit drama "Xiaomin Family" has finally come to an end, and Chen Zhuo and Xiaomin are supposed to finally get the right result, which belongs to everyone's happiness.
but I didn't expect that the writer even made a story about Chen Zhuo suffering from kidney cancer.
A careful plate shows that all the female characters in this show seem to be miserable.
first let's talk about Liu Xiaomin. Let's not elaborate on how unreliable my ex-husband Jin Bo is. I finally met Chen Zhuo and finally suffered from cancer.
Li Ping's ex-husband has nothing to say, but the two have different values. The present one looks rich, but at last he does something illegal. He still has a child abroad and loves my Sister Ping.
the worst one is Liu Xiaojie.
ex-husband Tong Bing is a mama's boy. He listens to his mother in everything and doesn't consider Liu Xiaojie's feelings at all.
after the divorce, the scene of Tong Bing and his mother going to Liu Xiaojie's house was really amazing.
Don't say hello, just go while your ex-wife is not at home, and brazenly say "take back your things" after being caught.
Tong Bing was seen wandering around the house, taking out his private money from idle boxes, rice jars, and abandoned books.
Liu Xiaojie looked in a daze and shouted, "Tong Bing, I didn't think you still have this skill?"
the ex-husband said nothing. The ex-mother-in-law counted the money and said, "if I don't teach him how to keep it, won't it all fall to you?"
after divorcing her ex-husband Tong Bing, Liu Xiaojie met Xu Zheng, who was younger than himself and looked talented.
in the face of the warm pursuit of gentle, considerate, high-quality members of the opposite sex, which girl can not fall?
I thought that Liu Xiaojie was about to usher in her spring and start a sweet love.
but unexpectedly, Liu Xiaojie had just been freed from the pit of mama's boy and fell into the abyss of controlling men.
Xu Zheng appears to be an intimate puppy under the New year, but he is actually a PUA scum man.
he does not allow Liu Xiaojie to have any intimate behavior with the opposite sex, not even his own nephew Jin Jiajun, who is related by blood.
this can be regarded as jealous, but Xu Zheng's next operation makes people suspect that "he is crazy."
Liu Xiaojie attended the classmate reunion and was caught on the shoulder by a male classmate. Xu Zheng saw that he was jealous in his heart and deliberately rear-ended the other party's car with a foot throttle to retaliate.
just a crazy criticism, normal people can't do such a thing!
when Liu Xiaojie questioned him in the car, he clapped the steering wheel and shouted angrily: "you are so close to other men, are you worthy of me?"
I'm sorry if I pick up my shoulder. This is 2022 years old, brother.
Xu Zheng's fierce appearance when he said that sentence was really frightening. In a trance, he seemed to see the shadow of childhood Anjiahe.
but even so, Liu Xiaojie obtained a certificate with Xu Zheng under the illusion of tenderness.
Xu Zheng became worse after marriage, and his interference with Liu Xiaojie was even more outrageous.
secretly stalking in life, surveillance at work, I feel suffocated when I think about it.
after finding a man's business card in the car, Liu Xiaojie was locked up at home directly, took her mobile phone, and restricted her movement.
in addition to these extreme behaviors, there is also brainwashing in language.
"because I love you and care about you, I ask you."
"Last time it was Qian Feng, and this time it was a male author. Do you really care about my feelings?"
"Why would someone as good as me look for a divorced woman? Because I love you. "
Xu is playing PUA well, holding high the banner of "I love you" to rationalize his excessive behavior.
the point is that Liu Xiaojie also convinced himself that "he just cares about me too much."
Wake up, sister, this is really not about ah!
there are not a few girls like Liu Xiaojie in the relationship.
there is an episode of the variety show "Love Defense" in which there is a long-distance couple.
when they have been together for two years, Lesser Snow thinks her boyfriend is very considerate and often asks her where she is. What are you doing? Who are you with?
she also thinks that her boyfriend cares about her and cares about her. But after a while, this "thoughtfulness" began to become morbid.
without Lesser Snow's consent, her boyfriend deleted all her contact information of the opposite sex, restricting her association with her friends, regardless of men and women.
have dinner with your best friend and keep talking on the phone. once Lesser Snow doesn't answer, he will hit his friends, and the bell rings one after another throughout the dinner table.
when Lesser Snow said he was disgusted with this kind of behavior, his boyfriend said confidently, "I think I can go shopping, watch movies and have dinner with you, too." He wants him to be the only one in Lesser Snow's world.
is this terrible lust for control really love?
in this program, teacher Tu Lei's comments hit the nail on the head:
"this man doesn't really love you. All his kindness to you is based on your obedience." Once you are disobedient, the man who is courting you in every way will become the most intolerable person, and he will turn you into a marionette. "
socializing with people with a strong desire for control can lead to emotional injury and loss of life.
do you remember Bao Li? The Peking University destroyed by PUAGirls.
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she committed suicide by taking medicine, but the reason behind it is the long-term mental manipulation and abuse of her boyfriend Mou Linhan.
accuses her of not cherishing her body and accuses her of giving the best things to others.
at first, Bao Li would retort, saying, "my best thing is my future," believing that Mou Linhan doesn't really love himself, but uses her as a tool to satisfy his selfish desires.
but what is so powerful about Mou Linhan is that he attributes his "belittling and insulting" to Bao Li to "possessiveness".
Why is there "possessiveness"?
because I love you.
Mou Hanlin also expressed the same meaning, because he is possessive, and because he loves you, it makes me miserable that you are not a virgin.
use such words, with superficial affection, to exercise spiritual control over Bao Li.
even before committing suicide, Bao Li said to her boyfriend, "I'm sorry. I met a shining you, but I'm a piece of garbage."
in this twisted relationship, how desperate you should be before you choose to go to the extreme.
also reflects from the side that the control of "in the name of love" is not love at all, but to satisfy one's own sense of existence.
Carina Lau once said in a variety show: "the most perfect control in marriage is not control."
I think this is probably the secret that she and Tony Leung have been together for 33 years from falling in love to getting married.
it is well known that their personalities are "not exactly the same, or at least irrelevant".
in current terms, it is a social fear, a social cow.
Tony Leung does not like to socialize and does not like to socialize. He likes to stay at home and enjoy his alone time. Carina Lau, on the other hand, likes to be lively, sociable and attends all kinds of parties.
the two people who seem completely inappropriate are the most at ease with each other.
Tony Leung Chiu-wai is the "shopkeeper" of the family, basically calling Carina Lau regardless of asking if something is broken. On a whim, he will fly to England alone to feed the pigeons.
if this had been put on the average couple, they would have quarreled a long time ago.
but Carina Lau never said anything and always helped him take care of everything so that he could be himself freely.
for Carina Lau, who loves to play, Tony Leung never stopped her from going out, even if Carina Lau held a noisy party at home.
as Carina Lau said: "two people have the comfort of two people, but we are used to giving each other space."
that's how true love should be.
although we have different personalities, I respect you and am willing to let you live as you like.
two people are together for happiness. If the other person's love only makes you feel suffocated and burdened, stay away as soon as possible.
Love should be based on mutual equality. Only in this way can we be happier.
finally, I would like to send you a sentence from Mr. Yang Jiang:
you may be worthless in front of one person, but priceless in front of another. Be yourself, those who love you, naturally love you, remember your own value, this is the way for people to live.