If you become more independent and less sociable...
Love yourself is the beginning of lifelong romance.
We are always in different circles. Friends' wine bureaus, colleagues' gossip and relatives' gatherings all come together naturally.
later I understood Schopenhauer's sentence: "only when a person is lonely, he is free."
if you become more and more independent and unsociable, don't worry, this is the beginning of loving yourself.
it is not that EQ becomes lower, but that it is no longer wronged.
once it was very simple to blend in with a group of people. It was nothing more than a conversation and a light meal.
save those who don't know much and get along with each other slowly.
if you have different interests, you can barely chat.
those who are not in tune with each other, secretly tilting their lips behind their backs, are still talking and laughing in front of people....
can be happy to get together, think about it, but only lonely.
someone posted on the Internet asked: "in a circle, they always ignore my existence, what should I do?"
all four of their girls are friends, but she obviously feels that the other three are closer.
those people have similar hobbies and values, and often have a hot chat in the group, but when she interrupts, most of them don't answer.
once in a while, she replied to her, and the other person disappeared immediately.
if any of those people are angry, the others will be aggrieved, and when something happens to her, it seems that their friends don't know.
when you need to try your best to fit into a circle, it only means that you don't belong to it.
someone in the comments section said that she had a similar experience. It was not until she was 30 that she began to clean up her interpersonal relationships and her life became full and happy.
when people interact with others, they should not only manage, but also depend on fate.
the false relationship makes you feel on pins and needles, don't know the taste, fake smile until your face is stiff, and you will be tired one day.
when you make up your mind to leave, they will criticize you for your low EQ.
but only you know that no more face-saving kung fu is the real relaxation and happiness.
you don't want to be the eye-catching one in the crowd, you don't want to make a fuss, and the most important thing is to stop wronging yourself.
not become numb, but learn to enjoy
there are always people who say that life is only fun when it is popular. If you stay alone, you will slowly become numb, and there will be nothing to look forward to.
but when you grow up, you will find that quiet is a different kind of enjoyment.
you used to like to huddle together, go downstairs with your colleagues for dinner, get used to carpooling after work, go to the supermarket on weekends, and call a roommate you share.
it's just that my time seems to be running out. When a friend calls you to see a movie, you fill up the whole day.
obviously you are still planning to run in the morning, read and practice, and write calligraphy, but you suddenly think that you have wasted a lot of time.
later, when you run every morning, you have to put on your headphones for fear of being disturbed.
when I go downstairs for dinner, I'm afraid of running into acquaintances and who will share the table.
when your colleagues invited you to dinner in the evening, you hesitated for a moment, then waved: "I cooked rice in the pot this morning."
get up at the weekend, no longer anxious to read the information in the mobile phone, read their own books, take care of flowers and plants, this is the most beautiful day.
some people say in my ear that this kind of life is so boring that you don't want to argue, because you know that you can get far more by walking alone than in the crowd.
Granny Zhang Mingshu, 68, got up in the morning to drink a glass of water and began to do yoga.
Breakfast with an egg and a glass of milk, with oatmeal biscuits and sweet pears.
she often wears fashionable clothes, watches art exhibitions and makes small videos alone.
stretch, read magazines, do scalp massage at night.
this is the life you want.
in the past, people who thought they were alone were empty-eyed and boring. When you have become such a person, you will find that the lamp of the soul is the brightest in silence.
because you live in the present, you can savor every detail carefully.
because of love, daily life itself is expectation.
you are lonely but not lonely, happy but not impetuous, and finally live the way you like.
every moment is a pleasure for you.
is not to become indifferent, but to love yourself more
everyone who loves to be alone is extremely gentle at heart.
We also took the initiative to reach out when our relatives were in distress, and patiently persuaded us all night when our friends collapsed.
but we know better that not many people can get in touch with each other often.
there was a popular video in which the host asked the interviewee several questions: "how many contacts do you have on Wechat?"
some people say that there are more than 100, but there are more than 1,000 contacts lying in the actual mobile phone, some only accidentally added, some only once in a while.
"how much can you delete if you delete people you won't contact actively?"
"regardless of work and entertainment, how many people are left if you delete some people?"
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"apart from your family, how many people can you tell the truth?"
from 20 or 30, deleted to two or three, some deleted to the end, the circle of friends is empty.
you have seen fireworks in the hustle and bustle, but when the fireworks are gone, you can only see endless emptiness.
I have cared about many people, accomplished many people, and loved many people, but for the rest of your life, it is time to give yourself some gentleness.
Cai Kangyong said, "if anything,We all count on ourselves to meet the expectations of others, and one day we will find it difficult. We should live for ourselves. "
may be a flash, you quit the WeChat group that hasn't spoken for a long time, and the people there haven't seen each other a few times.
if you delete the person who didn't speak after adding, I'm afraid you won't be in touch again.
when you see an old classmate you haven't seen for years, you just nod your head innocently.
limited social interaction is reserved for a limited number of people.
take the initiative to withdraw from some people's world and give your time back to yourself. Your heart is warm and the corners of your mouth are rising.
after all, loving yourself is the beginning of lifelong romance.
Shen Congwen wrote in "Travel between mind and things": "be alone, when you lack everything, you will find yourself."
you and I are like this, one moment suddenly saw through the false hustle and bustle, but also learned to be alone.
not to escape from life, not to be indifferent to others, not to have too low EQ, we just see clearly what is more important.
We just know how to love ourselves.
", be a cold person and enjoy being alone. In the wilderness of the soul, let the soul gallop and let expectations blossom.