Those who dare to show weakness are those who live thoroughly.
in life, there is a very strange phenomenon:
for example, at the wine table, the more capable people are, the quieter they are; the more incompetent people are, the more they boast and make noises.
for example, at work, the more capable people are, the more they respect different opinions; the more incompetent people are, the more likely they are to tell others what to do.
but in fact, those who jump the highest, scream the loudest and love to be in the limelight are generally not people with strength.
those who are really good are often quiet and good at showing weakness and clumsiness.
shows weakness, which is a state of "disdain"
Han Xin, known as the "Bing Immortal," made numerous achievements in his life and successively helped Liu Bang destroy the State of Qin, the State of Wei, and the State of Zhao....
but what admires future generations most is that he can endure the humiliation of his crotch.
when Han Xin was young, a butcher made a small request to Han Xin at the mouth of the vegetable market:
"either stab me with your sword or get under my crotch."
in those days, getting under other people's pants was no less than running naked in the square for three days and three nights now.
but Han Xin chose to bend over. He crawled over the butcher's crotch, then got up and patted the dust on his body, walking all the way through the laughter of the crowd.
many years later, Han Xin found the butcher and told him:
"at that time, I was not afraid of you, but I disdain to kill you.
if I killed you, I wouldn't be what I am today.
I can bet my life on Xiang Yu, Liu Bang, or even Queen Lu, but not on you. "
as the saying goes, the general has a sword and does not cut the flies; the general runs on the road and does not chase the rabbit.
it's not that I can't catch up, but that I disdain to chase it.
be clear and important, know how to advance and retreat, and know how to make a trade-off, so that you will not lose the big because of the small.
admitting defeat at the right time is not cowardice, but having a clear understanding.
bowing his head to show weakness is not a fear of things, but a state of disdain.
he who dares to show weakness has mountains in his eyes and hills in his chest.
they do not find a sense of existence in the eyes of others, nor do they disdain to be heroic in other people's words.
shows weakness, which is a kind of "circuitous" wisdom
have read a sentence:
"A wise man is as flexible as water: if he passes through sand and soil, he will percolate and accumulate strength, but when he touches rocks, he will make twists and turns.
A cliff droops into a waterfall, but when it comes to a high mountain, it takes a different path. "
during the warring States period, there were many famous military strategists, the most famous of whom were two apprentices of Gui Guzi, Sun Bin and Pang Juan.
in 342 BC, there was a war between the State of Wei and the State of Qi, and there was a stalemate in Maling.
Jun Tian Ji, a senior general of Qi, was so anxious that he hurriedly asked Chi Sun Bin.
Sun Bin said:
"Wei Jun has always relied on valor, and Pang Juan is now eager to fight a decisive battle with our army.
We should seize this mentality and tempt them to be fooled. "
so Sun Bin ordered that the Wei army should just retreat and gradually reduce the number of rice stoves in the camp.
on the first day, there were cooking stoves for 100000 people in the Qi army c on the next day, there were stoves for 50, 000 people; on the third day, there were only 30, 000 stoves left.
Pang Juan saw this and said proudly:
"I knew that the soldiers of Qi were as timid as mice, and now they have run away in less than three days!"
therefore, he handed down the general's order: leave infantry and heavy supplies, concentrate cavalry to advance light, and pursue and wipe out the Qi army.
Sun Bin has already made a detour to both sides of Maling Road, ambushing the Wei army.
in the end, the State of Qi defeated more with less, and wiped out the main force of the State of Wei at one stroke.
the so-called way of using troops is to attack the heart first and attack the city at the bottom.
Heart war is the first, war is the bottom.
this is especially true of being a human being.
if you are sincere, the world will naturally be a little less defensive about you.
if you are a tricky person, others will naturally deploy a bit tricky to deal with it.
Wang Yangming, a master of psychology, wrote "four tips for showing weakness" in Chen Yan's Border Affairs:
"if you want to take it, you must fix it.
Look no further than knee length cocktail dresses and radiate your elegant beauty. Take your picks and enjoy big 70% discount!
or give up cattle and horses and flee, or hide ingenuity to show weakness, or lie in ambush by pretending to be defeated, or make peace with the hidden army, are all to tempt me for profit. "
it is not wise to overexert oneself and show one's ability everywhere; to know how to be circuitous and clumsy is the top wisdom.
this tactic seems simple, but it can be exchanged for the greatest victory with the lowest cost.
shows weakness, which is a "broad-minded" pattern
in the fourteenth year of Zhengde, Emperor Wuzong of the Ming Dynasty, King Ning Zhu Jiehao launched a rebellion in Nanchang.
Wang Yangming raised his troops to the king, tried his best to turn the tide, gathered troops from all over the country, and quelled the rebellion in only 43 days.
but at this time, the eunuch encouraged the emperor to let King Ning out first, and then let the emperor personally counter the rebellion, in order to show the emperor's prestige.
on the other side, fearing that Wang Yangming would stop him, the eunuchs spread rumors that Wang Yangming and King Ning colluded in rebellion and captured King Ning because of his defeat.
Wang Yangming knows that once King Ning escapes, it may not be so easy to arrest again, and if he tries to counter-insurgency again, he still does not know how many people will die.
and Zhang Yong, the eunuch manager, is narrow-minded and will not give up if he does not take advantage of it.
so he asked to see Zhang Yong and gave away the service of counterinsurgency, but he said he could not get out of the illness and lived in the temple.
Zhang Yong got the benefit, tried his best to mediate, and finally eliminated a great disaster in the invisible.
many people complain for Wang Yangming, thinking that Wang Yangming is afraid of a group of eunuchs, but Wang Yangming doesn't care.
what is personal face at all in the face of the interests of the country?
people with great achievements should take a long-term view, be able to bend and expand, and take retreat as progress.
those who achieve great things should give priority to the overall situation and lift weights as if light, so that they can not only pick up but also let go.
they know that overexert wins for a while, showing weakness can win a lifetime.
learning to hide your edge is not only a realm, but also a pattern.
shows weakness, which is a kind of "indisputable" accomplishment
"know his male, keep his female, and be the master of the world."
for the world, Changde does not leave, return to the baby. "
when I was in college, there was a Shandong buddy Lao Zhang in the dormitory, who drank two jin of liquor and beer in a box.
during the National Day, my college classmates got married, and Lao Zhang and I made an appointment to attend the wedding together.
at the banquet, when talking about the amount of alcohol, a boy kept provoking Lao Zhang and wanted to compete.
I am well aware of Lao Zhang's foolhardy character, and I have a premonition that a storm of wine and wine is coming. I am afraid this boy will have a lot of bad luck.
Lao Zhang took out a medical record and said that he couldn't do it now. if he didn't drink, he would pour it.
A storm came to an end in the boy's mockery.
but Lao Zhang won the praise of some of us at the venue.
there are priorities and cognitive scores of three, six or nine.
in trivial matters, fighting over high and low will only pull down the pattern; with people at different levels, it will only be a waste of breath to win or lose.
A smile is far more posturing than a war of words; a proper sign of weakness is far more attractive than tit-for-tat.
when you reach a certain age, you will eventually understand that being quiet without striving is the most far-sighted accomplishment.
if you wait and see the changes, there will be less annoyance, less anger, more gentleness, and more maturity.
A famous French psychologist once said:
"if you want to make an enemy, it's easy. You just need to try your best to surpass him and squeeze him."
but if you want to win these friends, you have to make a small sacrifice-that is to let the other person surpass you and get ahead of you. "
those who dare to show weakness are people who live thoroughly.
Life is not a battlefield, there is no need to compete with each other in everything.
striving for fame and wealth, desire expansion, will live very tired.
knowing how to show weakness is not only a kind of self-cultivation, a kind of wisdom, a kind of pattern, but also a kind of realm.
in the future, I hope you and I can cultivate such a transparent state of mind, show weakness but not weakness, be strong but not strong, and live recklessly and calmly.